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Feelings of guilt, shame, and isolation
- Research has shown that carrying a burden of secrets can lead to feelings of guilt, shame, and isolation, as children grapple with the internal conflict between loyalty and honesty. Moreover, secrets kept out of fear or coercion can erode trust and communication within families, creating barriers to authentic connection.
www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/modern-minds/202406/ill-never-tell-rethinking-the-psychology-of-secrecy
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Feb 5, 2019 · Secrecy is associated with lower well-being, worse health, and less satisfying relationships. Research has linked secrecy to increased anxiety, depression, symptoms of poor health, and even the...
- Michael Slepian
Jun 25, 2024 · Research has shown that carrying a burden of secrets can lead to feelings of guilt, shame, and isolation, as children grapple with the internal conflict between loyalty and honesty. Moreover,...
Sep 17, 2021 · Key points. Researchers have identified 36 common secrets, and the average person keeps about 12 of them. Some secrets are harmful because they evoke shame, but other secrets can be empowering.
- What Is It About Keeping Secrets That Make Us Feel Bad?
- Shame Can Make Us Spiral, While Guilt Might Actually Be Helpful
- How Can We Prevent Secrets from Affecting Our Mental Health and Relationships?
Recent findings, including astudy from Columbia University, suggest that the problem isn’t so much the act of keeping secrets. Instead, our distress lies in repeatedly thinkingabout info we’re trying to conceal. The Columbia researchers, for instance, found that people who spent more time ruminating about their secrets tended to experience worse ph...
The terms guiltand shame are often used interchangeably, but they’re not the same. Guilt is a feeling of regret in response to “a specific situation, whereas shame is something we feel frequently and consistently, even if we haven’t done something wrong,” says Dr. Fedrick. If we cheat on a test, for example, we might feel guilty for getting a highe...
Living with secrets can lead to anxiety and distress. So, if you’ve been hiding something for a long time, consider how important it is to who you are today, says Felder. When we shift from “believing that secrets are a reflection of our identity, to understanding them as a reflection of past choices or behaviors, they can be less taxing on our rel...
- Nandini Maharaj
Why Are Some Secrets So Harmful? Concealing information can be psychologically damaging because the secret-holder has no opportunity to discuss the contents with other people.
Jul 25, 2022 · One of the biggest reasons we keep a secret is that we feel shame around it and fear we’d be judged if it came to light. The more immoral we feel our secrets are, the less likely we’ll share them with others.
Jun 3, 2022 · Is it unhealthy to keep a secret to yourself? The harm of a secret doesn’t seem to be from having to hide it in a social interaction, but having to live with it alone in your thoughts.