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- Best Sarcastic Quotes On Life “My mother always used to say: The older you get, the better you get, unless you’re a banana.” “I don’t have a welcome mat at my door because I’m not a liar.” “The informality of family life is a blessed condition that allows us all to become our best while looking our worst.”
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- “When people ask me stupid questions, it is my legal obligation to give a sarcastic remark.”
- “I’m not saying I hate you, what I’m saying is that you are literally the Monday of my life.”
- “Silence is golden. Duct tape is silver.”
- “I am busy right now, can I ignore you some other time?
Feb 19, 2021 · You always need motivation, and if in a sarcastic way, it works even better. Here are 125 sarcastic inspirational quotes to motivate you in the best way ever.
From relationships to work to politics, sarcastic quotes offer a clever and often sardonic take on the realities of everyday life. These sarcastic quotes on life tell you the impact on society, and why they continue to resonate with people around the world.
- Clever Sarcastic Quotes
- Humorous Sarcastic Quotes
- Sarcastic Quotes About Life
- Sarcastic Quotes About Work
- Sarcastic Quotes About Love
- Sarcastic Quotes About Family
- Sarcastic Quotes About Friends
- Sarcastic Quotes About School
- Sarcastic Quotes About Money
- Sarcastic Quotes About Success
“I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right.” “I’m not saying I hate you, but I would unplug your life support to charge my phone.” “My imaginary friend says that you need a therapist.” “I’m not great at advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?” – Chandler Bing “I feel so miserable without you, it’s almost like having you here.” –...
“I’m not arguing, I’m just telling you why you’re wrong.” “I’d agree with you, but then we’d both be wrong.” “I’m not bossy, I just know what you should be doing.” “I don’t have the energy to pretend I like you today.” “I’m not rude, I’m just honest.” “I’m not great at advice, but can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?” “I’m not saying you’re s...
“Life is short. Smile while you still have teeth.” “I’m not lazy. I’m on energy-saving mode.” “Life is a soup and I’m a fork.” “The more you weigh, the harder you are to kidnap. Stay safe. Eat cake.” “If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of payments.” “I’m not a complete idiot. Some pieces are missing.” “Life is short, ma...
“I can’t believe I got fired from the calendar factory. All I did was take a day off.” “I don’t work here. I’m a consultant.” “My boss told me to start every presentation with a joke. So I used my paycheck as the first slide.” “I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right.” “I always arrive late at the office, but I make up for it by leaving ...
“If love is the answer, could you rephrase the question?” – Lily Tomlin “Love is telling someone their hair extensions are showing.” “Love is being stupid together.” – Paul Valery “Marriage is a workshop where the husband works and the wife shops.” “Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener.” “Love is a two-way street constantly under constr...
“Family: where life begins and love never ends… until someone eats your leftovers.” “Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.” – George Burns “Home is where you are loved the most and act the worst.” “I smile because you’re my family. I laugh because there’s nothing you can do about it.” “Family: We may not ha...
“Friends are like stars. They come and go, but the ones that stay are the ones that glow.” “A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he knows that you are slightly cracked.” – Bernard Meltzer “Friends buy you food. Best friends eat your food.” “Friends come and go, like the waves of the ocean, but the true ones stick,...
“School: where you spend the first 18 years of your life preparing for the first eight-hour job you have.” “I was born intelligent, but education ruined me.” “If you think education is expensive, try ignorance.” – Derek Bok “School: where you are always a beginner at something you have no interest in.” “The only thing we learn from new books is the...
“Money can’t buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with.” “The safest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it in your pocket.” “Money talks, but all mine ever says is ‘Goodbye.'” “Money can’t buy happiness, but it can buy you a yacht big enough to pull up right alongside it.” – David Lee Roth “Whoever said money can’...
“Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.” – Jim Carrey “The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces.” – Will Rogers “Success is relative. It is what we can make of the mess we have made of things.” – T.S. Eliot “Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you ...
- “Life is hard; it’s harder if you’re stupid.” – John Wayne.
- “People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.” – A. A. Milne.
- “I’m such a good lover because I practice a lot on my own.” – Woody Allen.
- “The four most beautiful words in our common language: I told you so.” – Gore Vidal.
Aug 9, 2024 · Sometimes it takes a while to come up with wisecracks, so to give you a little boost of creativity to unleash your sardonic wit, here are some truly sarcastic quotes that are equal parts wise and hilarious.
Sarcastic quotes are good to keep in your arsenal whenever you need a smart and sharp comeback! In life, we’re thrown various scenarios that just make us tick. We get annoyed, bored, or in extreme situations, even angry about idiocy or lack of common sense.
