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- Secrecy is intentionally withholding personal information from one or more persons. Keeping secrets can often be harmful in the long run, both physically and psychologically. However, according to psychologists Michael Slepian and Alex Koch, it’s not the withholding that hurts us; instead, it’s the ruminating that harms.
www.psychologytoday.com/us/articles/202207/why-we-keep-so-many-secrets
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Jan 11, 2024 · Keeping secrets is generally thought of as quite a negative thing. Some research we've covered, for example, has found that secrets can leave us feeling literally weighed down, while other work has shown that even children understand why secrets can be damaging when handled badly.
Jun 25, 2024 · Research has shown that carrying a burden of secrets can lead to feelings of guilt, shame, and isolation, as children grapple with the internal conflict between loyalty and honesty.
Keeping secrets can often be harmful in the long run, both physically and psychologically. However, according to psychologists Michael Slepian and Alex Koch, it’s not the withholding that hurts...
- What Is It About Keeping Secrets That Make Us Feel Bad?
- Shame Can Make Us Spiral, While Guilt Might Actually Be Helpful
- How Can We Prevent Secrets from Affecting Our Mental Health and Relationships?
Recent findings, including astudy from Columbia University, suggest that the problem isn’t so much the act of keeping secrets. Instead, our distress lies in repeatedly thinkingabout info we’re trying to conceal. The Columbia researchers, for instance, found that people who spent more time ruminating about their secrets tended to experience worse ph...
The terms guiltand shame are often used interchangeably, but they’re not the same. Guilt is a feeling of regret in response to “a specific situation, whereas shame is something we feel frequently and consistently, even if we haven’t done something wrong,” says Dr. Fedrick. If we cheat on a test, for example, we might feel guilty for getting a highe...
Living with secrets can lead to anxiety and distress. So, if you’ve been hiding something for a long time, consider how important it is to who you are today, says Felder. When we shift from “believing that secrets are a reflection of our identity, to understanding them as a reflection of past choices or behaviors, they can be less taxing on our rel...
- Nandini Maharaj
Feb 5, 2019 · It hurts to keep secrets. Secrecy is associated with lower well-being, worse health, and less satisfying relationships. Research has linked secrecy to increased anxiety, depression,...
- Michael Slepian
Jan 22, 2019 · Keeping secrets limits responsiveness by preventing people from acting naturally and sharing freely. Beyond that, keeping secrets may actually cause harm.
Jul 25, 2022 · If the secret drags on your well-being, even just occasionally, take a close look at that hurt, and try your best to understand it. Now consider that perhaps keeping the secret does not cause harm to anyone else. Perhaps your secret protects someone you care about. Or maybe you have your reasons for keeping the secret.