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    • It feels so good and important for you to be the giver in almost every relationship.
    • You feel guilty when someone gives something to you.
    • You put the needs of others before your own.
    • You apologize excessively if you are not able to “give” the way you would like to.
  1. Nov 3, 2023 · The first step in breaking the over-giving habit is recognizing that you have it. Becoming aware of and acknowledging what so much giving is actually doing to you, and how it's impacting the ...

    • It’s increasingly obvious that your help and giving fosters dependence, irresponsibility, incompetence, or poor character. Sometimes we have to face the fact that our good intentions have gone bad.
    • The other person has violated numerous agreements, required many bailouts, and hasn’t used the help to do as promised. At this point, it’s time to stop believing them and giving them chances, at least for now (once you get strong evidence that they are ready to use your help to progress in life, you might try helping them again).
    • The help or giving helps someone to stagnate, or become stuck in an age-inappropriate earlier stage of development, or prevents them from developing needed life or professional skills.
    • Your helping or giving requires your dishonesty or somehow compromises your integrity. For example, making bogus excuses for another or covering for another, are almost never forms of healthy helping and giving.
    • What Giving Too Much Looks Like
    • Why You’Re Giving Too Much
    • Why You Need Balance
    • How to Restore Your Giving Balance
    • Tips For Balance

    You might be willing to consider that you’re overgiving. But how can you tell for sure? There’s an easy test that can help you determine if you’ve become an over-giver. When you’re in the middle of doing something for someone, pause for a moment and check-in with how you feel. Are you feeling joy over what you’re doing? Does it energize you? Or are...

    There are many reasons why we get into a pattern of giving too much. The underlying factor is usually because you really do care about others. You want them to be happy, loved, and taken care of. So you take on the task of doing it for them. Other reasons that can propel us to give too much include feeling insecure and taking on feelings of guilt o...

    Sure, our children, partners, families, and friends depend on us for love and caretaking. Communities need interdependent relationships to exist. But the problem is when one person is giving more than another. When you give and give, you’re at risk of getting burnt out and heading toward poor health. Your mental health is always on edge due to the ...

    Start by taking a long, critical look at your giving balance. Try to be as objective as you can be and not allow yourself to get pulled down a spiral of negative feelings. Just look at your balance for what it is. Determine when you’re giving out of love and when you’re giving out of guilt or negativity. Begin to prioritize your self-care routineag...

    Here are a few other ideas to help you find your own path back to balance. 1. Let go of control over a project and ask for help. 2. Teach your kids that you have feelings and needs so they will learn respect. 3. Be brave and tell others when you feel taken for granted. 4. Know when it’s time to back off and let others pick up the slack (and then le...

  2. Jul 11, 2020 · The three key signs to watch for are: 1. Exhaustion you can’t shake. Constant physical and mental exhaustion, even the weekend fails to refresh. People often report not wanting to get out of bed ...

    • Karen Nimmo
  3. Jun 23, 2021 · Giving too much depletes the giver both emotionally and physically. Greater Good explains that sacrificing one’s own needs and wants day after day causes a “loss of personal resources” in ...

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  5. Feb 20, 2024 · 10 Create An Affirmation. Giving too much in a relationship can stem from feeling like you’re not good enough. “These thoughts cause us to focus on trying to be enough for the other person ...

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