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Jul 19, 2024 · Need a good laugh? Check out 300 funny quotes to make you laugh out loud and improve your day with a few chuckles along the way.
- Funny Inspirational Work Quotes
- Funny Inspirational Movie Quotes
- Funny Inspirational Life Quotes
- Funny Inspirational TV Quotes
- Funny Inspirational Friendship Quotes
- Funny Inspirational Love Quotes
RD.com, Getty Images 1. “When you are asked if you can do a job, tell ’em, ‘Certainly I can!’ Then get busy and find out how to do it.” —Theodore Roosevelt 2. “Confidence is 10% hard work and 90% delusion.” —Tina Fey 3. “Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?” —Edward Bergen 4. “Oh, you hate your job? Why didn’t you say so? There’s ...
RD.com, Getty Images 23. “Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.” —Ferris Bueller’s Day Off(1986) 24. “A little nonsense now and then is relished by the wisest men.” —Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory(1971) 25. “Why, sometimes I’ve believed six impossible things before breakfast.” —Alice in...
RD.com, Getty Images 36. “Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive.” —Elbert Hubbard 37. “Life is hard. After all, it kills you.” —Katharine Hepburn 38. “I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade, and try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party.” —Ron White 39. “My therapi...
50. “Life is short. Drive fast and leave a sexy corpse. That’s one of my mottos.” —Stanley Hudson, The Office 51. “Life is just a big bowl of fancy assorted cashews!” —Patrick Star, SpongeBob SquarePants 52. “Your soul is like your appendix—I don’t even use it!” —Michael Kelso, That ’70s Show 53. “What am I scared of? I’m scared of the same thing t...
RD.com, Getty Images 70. “True friends are those who really know you but love you anyway.” —Edna Buchanan 71. “Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down.” —Oprah Winfrey 72. “When you’re in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend ...
RD.com, Getty Images 87. “There are few things in life harder to find and more important to keep than love. Well, love and a birth certificate.” —Barack Obama 88. “Marriage: a friendship recognized by the police.” —Robert Louis Stevenson 89. “I love being married. It’s so great to find one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life....
Nov 14, 2018 · They are so uplifting they sound like they came straight from your parent's mouth, 'you're special' or 'you can do anything if you put your mind to it,' and let's not forget 'when life gives you lemons make lemonade,' and all the other happy-go-lucky bullcrap of motivational quotes.
“If you think your boss is stupid, remember: You wouldn’t have a job if he was any smarter.” - John Gotti “If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping in a room with a mosquito.” - Dalai Lama “The best way to appreciate your job is to imagine yourself without one.” - Oscar Wilde
- “Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.” —Mark Twain.
- “The problem with the world is that the intelligent people are full of doubt, while the stupid people are full of confidence.” —Charles Bukowski.
- “You can tell how smart people are by what they laugh at.” —Tina Fey.
- “Silence is the best response to a fool.” —Unknown.
These are the funniest inspirational quotes of all-time that are loaded with insight and life lessons, while also teaching us not to take ourselves too seriously. “You’re only given a little spark of madness. You mustn’t lose it.”. – Robin Williams.
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Aug 14, 2024 · Like perfectly timed funny quotes, a sarcastic comment can put someone rude in their place or help you make a self-deprecating joke (think: tripping over your shoelace and saying “Smooth move,...