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Dec 16, 2015 · On Dec. 3, 1979, the Who were struck by another unforeseen tragedy when 11 fans were trampled and killed at a Who gig in Cincinnati. The guitarist's personal life was also unraveling. His marriage ...
- Sterling Whitaker
After touring Who's Next, and needing time to write a follow-up, Townshend insisted that the Who take a lengthy break, as they had not stopped touring since the band started. [162] There was no group activity until May 1972, when they started working on a proposed new album, Rock Is Dead—Long Live Rock! , [ 163 ] but, unhappy with the recordings, abandoned the sessions.
3 days ago · In the spring of 2019, I had my first friendship breakup. It ended with a bitter argument, tears, frustration, and we haven't spoken since. For a long time I grieved the loss of that friendship ...
- Overview
- Why End a Friendship?
- Healthy Ways to End a Friendship
- What to Expect When a Friendship Ends
- Keep in Mind
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Let's be honest, friend breakups are sometimes even harder than romantic ones. The bond of a friendship is a unique soul connection that has nothing to do with your looks or expectations of the future.
Friendships are free from many of the rules and qualifiers of a romantic relationship, making them more organic and pure in many ways. And where we are at least somewhat prepared, for a romantic relationship to potentially end, we are generally unprepared for the end of a friendship.
But the reality is that people grow and change throughout their lives and sometimes we are no longer a good fit—sometimes they're no longer a fit for us either. Sometimes our trust is betrayed, or maybe something was said that can't be taken back.
Unlike romantic relationships in which there are clearer precedents about how to break up, the same is not true for friendships. This can leave you in a strange sort of limbo where you no longer want to be friends with the person but don't know how to end the friendship either.
It's complicated and painful no matter what, but there are some protocols and generally accepted dos and don'ts when it comes to breaking up with a friend.
Before you decide how to break up with a friend, it's helpful to understand the reasons why you no longer want to be friends with this particular person. This can make it easier to move forward as you end the friendship.
One way to achieve this goal is by journaling your feelings. This allows you a safe space to get your thoughts out without discussing them with others, which you may not want to do until they are clear in your own mind.
Reasons you might identify for wanting to end a friendship include:
•Change of circumstances: Your lives have changed in that you no longer work together, go to the same school, or otherwise interact with each other in the same way.
•Increased distance: You've grown apart in terms of interests or commitments, or one of you has physically moved, creating a situation where you don't see each other as often as you once did.
•Mental health reasons: Your friend is deceitful or negative, spending more time cutting you down than building you up. Or you simply no longer enjoy the friendship like you used to.
The Gradual Fade-Out
This tactic involves letting the friendship come to a natural close by gradually reducing social interaction with the other person. This is akin to taking the stitches out of a garment versus tearing it apart. Gradually fading out of the friendship might be a good option if you are afraid of confrontation, if the person is likely not to listen or accept what you are saying, or for toxic situations. In general, fading out of a friendship is an attempt to avoid hurt feelings. Instead of laying your feelings on the line, you become too busy to get together or generally hard to reach. You might text instead of call, fade out of the person's social media (unfollowing them or muting their account as needed), take a long time when getting back in touch, answer with short replies, etc. You are doing things that might naturally happen in a friendship that is fading—you're just choosing to do them intentionally to exit the friendship. While fading out of friendship may seem kinder, it could drag on if the friend does not take the hint. In that case, you might be putting that person through a stressful situation as they try to guess what is going on or why you've suddenly disappeared. At the same time, the fade-out might be your best option if the friendship is toxic and you don't want to have to explain yourself, if you've been harmed by the person, or if you don't care enough anymore to give them an explanation. Letting Go of a Relationship That Stresses You
Having a Talk
If you determine that a gradual fade-out is not appropriate or if it ends up not working, you might need to have a talk with your friend. This is similar to a talk you would have in a romantic relationship to determine where each of you stands and to talk about the future. Step 1: Ask the person to meet you for coffee to chat. If you're concerned about your physical or emotional safety, you may decide to contact them via text, over the phone, or by email instead. Step 2: Have a goal for your talk. Think about what you want to achieve. Do you want to clear up a miscommunication, explain resentment, address an old argument, or set boundaries in the relationship? Whatever it is that you hope to achieve, it needs to be clear in your head before you meet. Step 3: Start out with a statement that opens the doors for more conversation. For example, you might say, "I've noticed some patterns in our friendship in the past few months that have been bothering me. I wondered if we could talk about it." Step 4: Talk about how you are feeling, not what the other person has done wrong. Keep your goals for the conversation in mind. Remember to listen as much as you talk. Focus on using "I" statements when you speak. An "I" statement, such as "I feel sad when you don't show up after we've made plans," puts the emphasis on your feelings instead of placing blame only on your friend. Even if you're angry or upset with your friend, it might be less stressful for both of you if you let them down easily. Tell them what you do appreciate about them. Just because you're ending the friendship doesn't mean you don't value the time you spent together. A talk can be a stepping stone to the end of a friendship, but you might also find that you are able to resolve your differences and fix the friendship instead.
Taking a Break
You may determine from having a talk that your differences can't be resolved. If that's the case, what do you do? You could immediately terminate the friendship or you could decide to take a break, much the same way people sometimes take breaks in romantic relationships. Taking a break can have many positives. It gives you: A fresh perspective on the friendship A moment to calm down if you are upset An opportunity to miss your friend if you were spending too much time together Time to reevaluate the friendship You can give any number of reasons for taking a break. If you prefer to be vague, you might say that you are going to be extra busy for a couple of weeks. If you've just had a talk, you could say that you need time to digest everything you've discussed. Set a time in the future to reconvene, or suggest that you will get in touch when you feel you are ready. While on the break, you can always mute or unfollow their social media account to provide some added distance. You might find that clearing the mental space this friend once occupied can be a helpful refresher and benefit the relationship. If you choose to continue the friendship, be sure that both of you communicate your boundaries and expectations moving forward.
Though you may have plenty of valid reasons for ending a friendship, this doesn't necessarily protect you or your former friend from the feelings that go along with a friend breakup.
Remember that feeling sad that a friendship ends doesn't mean that you made the wrong decision. Having an idea of your friend's possible reaction and what you'll feel after the breakup can help you mentally prepare for the end of the friendship.
Breaking up a friendship can be just as stressful and emotionally draining as ending a romantic relationship. Be kind to yourself afterward. It's normal to feel sad, frustrated, or angry.
The approach you take is up to you and depends on the reasons for ending the friendship. Some possibilities are having a talk, gradually fading out, or ending it cold turkey. Keep on top of your mental health to ensure that the end of the friendship does not cause additional problems.
Sometimes, you and a friend may not click the way you once did.; Whether you've grown apart or the relationship has become toxic, at some point, you may need to break up with a friend.; Here ...
Oct 26, 2018 · Long-time friends like Jenny and Rachel have been through a lot together. Theyve anchored each other through teenage angst, countless boyfriends, the birth of their children, the end of Rachels ...
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The One Where Ross and Rachel Take a Break: Directed by James Burrows. With Jennifer Aniston, Courteney Cox, Lisa Kudrow, Matt LeBlanc. Ross seeks solace at a party after a bitter fight with Rachel and ends up in the arms of another woman; Phoebe's date needs an interpreter to communicate.
