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Understanding grief » Grief experiences » Partner or spouse. Losing your husband, wife or partner is one of the most painful experiences in life. Different feelings after a partner dies. Loneliness. If you lived with your partner the fact that they are not with you is impossible to forget, and losing that companionship is very hard.
Mar 15, 2024 · These verses offer words of comfort, assurance, and hope in the midst of grief and loss. They can be a source of strength for those mourning the death of a spouse. If you’ve experienced the death of a spouse, a checklist can be immensely helpful in guiding you through all of the necessary post-death tasks.
If your husband, wife, or civil partner dies, there may be bereavement benefits or financial support available to you. This can include Bereavement Support Payment, Widowed Parent’s Allowance, and Universal Credit.
Feb 3, 2015 · Here are 11 things not to say to a widow or widower: 1. Be grateful for the time you were married. 2. You’re still young. You can always remarry. 3. You must stay strong for your children. 4. Don’t feel bad, your husband is no longer in pain (if he died of an illness) 5. Your wife wouldn’t want you to be sad. She’d want you to celebrate ...
- Overview
- Go Easy on Yourself After the Loss of a Spouse
- Take Care of Your Physical Health
- Seek Support After the Loss of Your Spouse
- Adjust Your Social Life
- Seek Help for Complicated Grief
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The loss of a spouse can be devastating, whether the death is sudden or following a long illness. Losing a spouse can change your whole world, leading to grief, confusion, anger, sadness, and guilt.
One day you are married; the next, you are single, alone, and grieving. Between the intense emotions, the lifestyle changes, and the many practical considerations accompanying your spouse's death, you probably feel overwhelmed and anxious about your future.
At a Glance
Losing a spouse is a heartbreaking experience. It's vital to find ways to manage the pain and take care of yourself as you grieve. Over time, the grief will likely subside, and you will build a new life for yourself. In the meantime, here are some tips to help you cope.
The Loss of a Loved One Hits Hard—Does It Ever Get Easier?
How You May Feel After Losing Your Spouse
You may feel numb, shocked, brokenhearted, or anxious. You may feel guilty for being the one who is still alive or relieved that your spouse is no longer suffering. You might even feel angry at your spouse for leaving you. You may cry a lot, or you may not. How you grieve is unique to you. Be prepared for friends and family who may not know what to say, avoid you, or try to comfort you with cliches (such as "he's in a better place"). Often, well-meaning people are uncomfortable talking about death, but it doesn't mean they don't care. If you can, tell those close to you what you need (or don't need). If people avoid mentioning your spouse, for example, and you actually want to talk about them, let them know. Keep in mind that your friends and family are also grieving and may find it comforting to share memories of your spouse. Avoid Making Big Decisions After Experiencing a Death
Grieving can take a toll on your body as well as your emotions. You may have no appetite or have trouble sleeping. It may be easier said than done, but try to take care of yourself by eating well, exercising, and getting enough sleep. Try to avoid drowning your sorrows by drinking excessively, as that can actually exacerbate your pain.
One study found that the risk of death for the surviving spouse goes up, particularly in the first three months of bereavement. Taking care of your physical health in the months after your loss is essential.
Coping with the aftermath of loss is often extremely lonely and confusing, and it is not unusual to feel depressed. The loss of a spouse is also associated with an elevated risk of the onset of a number of different psychiatric disorders.
Studies suggest that a lack of social support after an unexpected loss is a key predictor of depression. For this reason, it is important to reach out to other people in your life for help.
You may be inclined to turn inward or withdraw socially. Resist the urge to seclude yourself. You'll probably fare better if you seek support from family, friends, your religious community (if you have one), or a counselor.
If you or a loved one are struggling with depression and grief, contact the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) National Helpline at 1-800-662-4357 for information on support and treatment facilities in your area.
For more mental health resources, see our National Helpline Database.
Joining a support group with other people who are grieving can also be very comforting. Your healthcare provider, therapist, or local hospital can usually provide information on locating such groups. Numerous bereavement groups are available online as well.
Navigating your social life as a single person can be complicated. If you and your spouse socialized with other couples regularly, you may not know how to fit in now. You may feel awkward going to parties and other events solo.
Tell your friends how you feel and explain that you may need to avoid "couples" dinner parties and get-togethers for a while and see friends one-on-one instead.
Losing a spouse is life-changing and profound grief is a normal reaction. Sometimes, though, grief is so profound that it interferes with your ability to move forward with your own life. This is known as "complicated grief," and it affects an estimated 7% of bereaved people.
Signs of complicated grief include:
•Feeling as if you have no purpose anymore
•Having difficulty performing everyday activities
•Experiencing continued feelings of guilt or blaming yourself for your loved one’s death
•Wishing you had died as well
- Sheri Stritof
May 8, 2018 · 3. Expert advice on coping with the death of your spouse or partner. The death of your partner can leave a big hole in your heart. Whether you’ve known your partner a few months or been married...
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What to say to someone who is grieving. When someone dies, it can be hard to know what to say to those who were close to them. While each bereaved person’s experience will be different, these tips will give you ideas for how to help them feel heard and supported through their grief.
