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  1. Jun 13, 2023 · 1. Avoid labeling yourself. Generally, when people fail at something, their immediate response is self-loathing. They’ll berate themselves for being idiots or losers because they didn’t succeed at their attempt. Instead of thinking “I failed at this,” their inner voice says “I AM A FAILURE.” Try to avoid these kinds of negative labels.

    • Finn Robinson
  2. Sep 19, 2016 · Each time you bounce back from problems and rise above obstacles, you can grow mentally stronger. Failure can show you that you’re stronger than you think and you can handle more than you...

    • Be kind to yourself. It’s an old one, but a good one: practise some self-compassion. Being self-compassionate entails being kind and non-judgemental towards yourself in the face of difficulty — including failure.
    • Resist “socially prescribed perfectionism” If you feel that other people expect you to be perfect, and will judge you harshly if you fail to meet their expectations, you experience this type of perfectionism.
    • Don’t worry too much if you were over-confident — and wrong. Overconfidence is not a good thing; it leads us to study less hard and make more mistakes.
    • Try not to take evidence of failure too personally. A recent set of studies on almost 1,700 American participants, published in Psychological Science, found that feedback on what they had got wrong on a variety of tests or tasks rather than what they had got right — a “failure focus” rather than a “success focus” — undermined subsequent learning.
    • Failure shows us what we are missing. When we fail at something, it’s often because success required something we did not have. It might be a certain skill or capability we don’t possess or even a set of resources we do not have.
    • Failure shows us what we care about. Failure shows us that we are invested in life. After all, before we fail at something, we must have decided we wanted to try it.
    • Failure forces a fresh start. When we are staring down an undeniable failure, it has a way of kicking denial to the curb. In those painful moments, we are faced with a reality that may feel pretty bleak on the surface.
    • Challenge your thoughts. “People can cope with feeling like a failure by first recognizing that thoughts are not facts,” says Dr. Sera Lavelle, a clinical psychologist.
    • Minimize comparison to others. Social media can make it hard to feel good about yourself when everyone’s accomplishments and victories are all you see.
    • Notice the positive. “At any given moment, more things are going right for you than not”, says licensed professional counselor Gabriella Chisholm. When uncomfortable feelings such as failure arise, Chisholm suggests practicing gratitude.
    • Engage in self-compassion. Everyone makes mistakes. Yet, we often respond to these mistakes by shutting down our feelings or shaming ourselves. Holding a negative perception of yourself can lead to feeling quickly defeated by challenges since it can seem like proof of what you already believe: You’re not good enough.
  3. May 25, 2017 · By associating your failure with something less weighty, you may dull its detriment on your brain and improve subsequent performance. In short, resist dwelling on your failure once you’ve ...

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  5. Mar 5, 2024 · If you feel like a failure, you're not alone. First, take comfort in knowing you’re not the only one who feels this way. It’s common to feel like a failure when things don’t pan out as planned. It’s also important to remember that how you determine what failure is can change.

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